Praise Jesus He’s Dead!

Yesterday I was reminded via facebook of the ridiculous things Christians believe about death. Someone had just passed away, and the facebook post went something like, “Praise Jesus for new bodies that work and eternity in heaven!” Its hard for me to remain sympathetic when I read something like that because the asshole center of my brain has been over-stimulated. But really, how old mentally can these people actually be? Can you truly function as an adult while believing that existence is based on a [ludicrous] fairy tale? I remember when I believed these things… I was quite young, and it sounded swell. We Christians never had to develop an intellectual understanding of death… we never had to accept it.  How can you respect life when you do not believe in death?

I stopped believing the fairy tales about new bodies and heaven long before I realized it, but the truth peeked its head when a very close friend of mine passed away in an automobile crash, he was 23. Staring at his lifeless body, I was overwhelmed with the finality of it. I mean, what the fuck was this shit? Death. I couldn’t comprehend it, but inside I knew something was terribly wrong. Everyone was acting casual, though. Sad, but not devastatingly so. Why were people being so callous?  Why were people rejoicing?  Oh, its because they didn’t think he was really gone. They didn’t have to accept this thing that had happened, because it didn’t really happen. He was floating around with god now in some alternate dimension, playing, laughing, Earthen life being sooo last year.

The zombie-like, apathetic Christian response to death is due to a stunted growth into adulthood.  The infancy of it astounds me… I had somehow forgotten that people still really think this way.